Modern Living

Is it that great ?

Yes we have sat navs I-pods HDTV and the Internet, we can order any kind of food without moving, we can shop without moving, we dont even have to walk our own dog, we have a whole raft of services available to us for our every whim and as I saw on TV the other night there is somebody out there who will arrange our wardrobe and sort our sock drawer for the small fee of about £2k.

Now this isn't going to turn into a rant about obesity levels and how lazy we have all become as I think this misses the point, however I do think that all this comes at a huge sacrifice?

These are my own opinions therefore not fact and I can only reflect based on my own experiences but:

Have we now turned into a race that despises its own species ?
We seem to be at war with everyone and everything
Opinion is wrong unless it agrees with our own and if doesn't well we will just go to war.
Arrogance is the new word for good manners?
There is no class system supposedly but if you have the PS2 instead of the PS3 or the Ford instead of the Bently then you are beneath me regardless of moral stature

and my main point where have all our manners and morals gone?

A few of my personal experiences (this all happenned this week and it is only Tuesday)

On a train I am man with a large bag I stuff my large bag into the overhead storage and it does not matter that a (mine) coat is there already.
I am another man on a train I will sit cross legged so that the sole of my foot touches your knee and imparts road grime onto your trousers (now I know in eastern cultures that someone displaying the soles of their feet are considered rude maybe I had a past life in China or somewhere (I did but thats another topic)) but I also find that really offensive both of these people I had to point out what they were doing and they responded in the typical way sorry but what they meant was sorry I got caught

Here are some new rules for modern living:
Sorry is now the new excuse me but with a subtle difference you state sorry (modern translation excuse me) and that gives you carte blanche to walk straight into anyone?
On leaving a shop the person going out of the shop has no right of way over the person coming in anymore
If I don''t look at you, you are not really there and I can push in front of you at a queue.
My destination is always far more than important than yours therefore I have total right of way whilst driving walking standing or talking
If you are waiting to be served in a shop and I walk in behind you I have a perfect right to be able to stand exactly where you are standing now if not I am alllowed to huff puff and shuffle occasionally nudging you just to make my measley point
I no longer have to put my hand over my mouth to cough or sneeze
I cannot press the number for you in a lift anymore you just have to barge a person out of the way to
If you wear a suit you must hate no suit wearers and vice versa
I can tread on your foot bump into you do anything I like and i no longer have to apologise
We cannot smile or make eye contact any more
You are odd if you start a conversation with a stranger
Morals were things at the end of the story on those papery thingys that you used to read your kids before the invention of CBeebies
If I give you my car park ticket with an un used portion of time on it I am not being nice I am really trying to mug you.


OK the writing is jocular but I have experienced all this and sometimes I experience all these things in one day so sod the PS3 where's my pooh stick !

Did this post make your laugh ? can you relate ? so what annoys you and more importantly what can we all do to change ? can we change ? (I hope so)

Hi Jason

I totally agree with everything you have written I did chuckle as this is all so true not just of other people but perhaps some of us are guilty of some of these things too!! Why? I have no idea,but i think we have all become a very rude,angry,arrogant nation.Perhaps they have put something in our water lol x

oh yes jason you go
i feel the same but then i experiance things that give me more faith in people
one day i broke down on a main road there was nothing around and my battery was dead on my phone i walked for miles to the nearest small village no one stoped and asked if i was ok and i was on my own which dissapointed me as i would have stopped with a lady walking down a major road on her own, then i got to the village there was no shop or phone box and i bumped into a lady delivering kleeneze she was the only person about and i asked her if she new where the nearest pphone box was she told me there was not one in the village but let me use her mobile and wouldnt even take any money for the call and i was rescued by the lovely AA man who gave my car a complete check which was lovely,

but then there was another time when i was waiting for a parking space and an elederly couple just drove infront of me and took the space and a onlooker even shouted at me i went home and just cryed as my faith in socity was lost,
no one says thankyou any more neither especially when you hold open a dooralso
i recently heard about a person who started up a page on a networking sight i think it was facebook, he opened his sight with 'join me' and lots of people joined it shows how desperate people are for some kind of faith. so many people joined that he felt guilty as it was just a joke,that he told everyone that had joined him that the aim of it was to do a kind jesture with no personal gain for someone you dont know every friday. which i thought was beautiful.

i think due to governments and media extext we are being formed into a society of fear which is a control and makes us feel like we have too look after number one . and people stop helping each other and even speaking to each other through fear.
at the end of the day i feel the main basic need other than food and shelter ext that people need is someone to care a bit of attention and someone who has the time, and time really resinates with me because who has time in our fast rushing society so it is important we make the time for each other to give people attention and care about them, even families turn against each other nowa days so no one has a stable emotional base or someone they can talk to no matter what. even if you do you still need to make the time for the special people in our lives which even i find myself guilty of not making the time, as i get swep up by society and find i have to take a step back and think about slowing down
we are driven by short term solutions or quick fixes for our emotional needs to be met due to not having the time even the mental health service in my opinion is driven be a sticky plaster approach lets feed you some drugs and ignore the problem,
we need to go back to old methods of healing i feel and its such ashame that we have to relearn them
hmmm i dont know if any of thet makes sense but i feel better
lots of love

The trouble is we have forgotton what we came down to do in the first place, and that was to learn new things and experiences. The trouble is that in our society you either have to be a follower or a leader. And you have to conform to society rules. Everyone is given a label, fat, thin, short, tall, depressive, and in my case 'the small wierd women who talks to the dead, and makes lotions and potions from herbs . Because of this some so called friends and even family members dont talk any more. I have been spat on sworn at and abused by these so called people who class me as strange, whilst all the time they label themselves as being 'normal'. But what is normal any way? Until the day actually dawns when we can respect each other, the constant wars, and natural disasters will continue to happen. Please dont anyone shoot me for what i am going to say next as it is just a believe system i have, if we go back to the second world war, which was absolutely terrible, and many lifes were sadly taken away (including members of my own family), and see what actually happened. People forgot all about status, class and actually worked together again to survive. It didnt matter if you were rich, poor, black,white, gay or straight we helped each other. Life has now gone back to the day where we are judged for who we are, we take what we wont, rather than what we need, we abuse our planet and each other and then expect our lifes to be happy and full of cheer. Until we all accept that life isnt and doesnt have to be full of material things, and power, the trials, tribulations, wars, famine and hatred will continue. Lets hope what ever happens in 2012 will sort our world out for ever, but i am at this moment Human and i struggle to believe this planet can ever be calm and tranquil. One thing i know for sure is that if peoples attitudes dont change, then we will be a planet at war all over again, bombs and distruction will once again take control and many more lifes will be lost. Lets hope someone 'upstairs' steps in to combat this before its too late.

XXX

Excellent ideas i thought I was the one going silly

Sapphire - you are right I think we sometimes can be guilty I most certainly am and I think that is why it troubles me so much I don't want to be like that but we are in a society where it seems to be more acceptable to be nasty than nice I want to beat em not join em.

Rainbowbrite again excellent points you are spot on with the sticky plaster although I don't think that that is from a lack of care I think that those actually employed in the front line are there for the right reasons I just think their hands are tied these people are so tied up in health trusts, under resourced and red taped to the hilt that they just cannot do their job adequately and as usual the poor guys that need the help suffer the management then invest more money in management to find out what went wrong and it all spirals

Ellie61267
If you are getting nasty comments about your belief system then it is the fault of others faulty programming not yours after all no one has scientifically proven the existence of "God" although it is totally acceptable to believe in that !!

I will also not shoot you down for your 2nd world analogy I have often thought to myself that a natural disaster globally is needed to bring that caring attitude back it seems to be that only in adversity do our wonderful qualities shine through.

It has taken a long time to be able to ignore others comments, but i have finally managed to let them all go, difference is i know where im going! hehe. Most of the time i think its because of peoples own fear that they cannot accept any different point of view, and thats where i differ to them, as i can accept any sort of belief system, if whatever you believe in makes you a better happier person that doesnt judge others then it is doing what its supposed to do.

Take care, big hugs
xxx

Hey Jason, Ellie, Saphire & Rainbowbrite,

Like yourselves, I have noticed how different society has become, even more so as for my main job I am employed at a Police station as a Service Desk Assistant which in laymans terms means i assist the public with their enquiries when they come into police station or ring up!!

You would not belive the protocol that has changed within the police and social type services over the last few years since I have worked there, not to mention all the school policies etc. Before I got the job in the police I worked briefly ie for 3 days for age concern, supposedly doing odd jobs for the elderly like errand running and light housework, but i couldnt handle it, since if you made them a drink you absolutely had to ensure you did not accidently tough their hand or fingers??????? I may have been the only person this fellow human being saw in days and I was not allowed to even hold their hand or give them a hug, I could not carry on as it was clear that a lot of them would have been comforted by this simple act, I found it too dehumanising to do this work. As far as I know it is the same in schools where teachers and meal supervisors (dinner ladies to me) cant hug kids that are upset, or fall over in the playground!!

What is really missing right now is LOVE not romantic love, but love for our fellow being and I really understand ellies comments re the 2nd world war, as that is what we need although not a war as such but another way of uniting people in a common cause ..... perhaps the revival of the real human race, the one that had honour, compassion, empathy things so sadly missing in todays society.

In my job some people frown when you show compassion or empathy for people, but I still do, and I try to make a difference to every single person that comes in, sometimes they make it impossible for you and are rude and drunk and shout and swear, but sometimes it is possible to make a break through, and I try and ensure that when someone leaves they are happier than when they came in.

Several people especially those in distress, have thanked me, and I can feel a sense of oneness with them in the single moment in time.

I have now got into the habbit of asking my guides to talk with guides or higher self of every living being I come into contact with so we can share the best possible outcome for the meeting, and this does make a difference as on occasions where I forget though tiredness from the shiftwork, or illness or whatever, there always seems to be more anger and agression in the air.

I give distant Reiki to any animals that are brought in, offer a hand of support to people in distress.

Sadly almost 75% of the jobs we get in, are based on people not getting on with other people, family, neighbours, strangers, it is appaling. People in the main do have little respect for others, and is a sad fact, but there does seem to be hope as sometimes you will meet an exception to the rule, and often it is the person you would least expect to help that does help.

One of my mentors Louanne Oakes said she finds it helpful when faced with a difficult situation or when it seems anger gets a grip of you to say in your mind "I choose peace and love instead of this" or " I send love and blessings to ??????" whoever the person you are having a conflict with. I have done this also and it does help.

Namaste

Elaine

I know what you mean Elaine, when you talk about not being able to touch another person. I work full time as a Psychic(yuk hate that word) and just recently i am seeing a lot of children with different problems ranging from abuse, eaing disorders, A D H D and behaviour problems. And one thing that most of these kids have in common, is they have either never been loved or cuddled or had the closeness of touch. Which has a knock-on effect as they dont know how to give love or even respect back. Hence we are now ending up with some kids striving for attention through other means, causing trouble getting drunk etc. It is so sad for me to see these children on a weekly basis, as both them and their parents dont know how to give affection to each other. Each time my own girls leave the house or put down the phone i ensure i always say those three little words 'i love you', these words mean so much as they just prove we all do care. People constantly say that kids of today have no respect for the older generation, but do the older generation take the time and trouble to give these kids any form of respect? respect has to work as a complete circle. If the rule makers of this world actually sat down and talked to these kids as i do, maybe they will be able to see why some of these kids have turned out the way they have. When you look into a 15 year olds eyes and see the physical abuse i have, or the 13 year old boy who is to scared of showing any emotion incase he gets a beating, its no wonder they find comfort in alcohol or drugs, as this then makes them forget about all their problems.
Quote ( from my book, which is due out at the end of febuary)
Look at life through a childrens eyes, and maybe you will see things differently

Lots of love and big snogs

xxx

Hi Ellie,

I totally agree with you, as we see so many kids in trouble, and like you say they have no idea how to behave, they have not had any nuturing or affection given to them and some parents just don't seem to understand how or why their kids have ended up getting in trouble. Your posting reminded me of something awful that happened some time last year when a mother who was on drugs and couldn't cope tried to commit suicide in front of her 2,3 and 8 year old children. The 8 year old called the police and the children were ppo'd (police protection order) and brought to the police station, however the 14 year old could not be traced as she had run away when it happened.

To cut a long story short social services, managed to find temporay accomodation for the 2 smallest children toghether with the 8 year old, and then when an officer found the 14 year old, who was sobbing her heart out, he spoke to social services who promised her if she came into the station she could go to the same home as the other children, so although she had been separated from her siblings the last time this happened, she trusted the police officer who brought her in to the station.

Once she got there she was placed in our interview room while the officer contacted social services who said they would call back, by this time the other 3 children had been collected and taken to the temporaty accomodation.

The officer was due to go off duty and asked if he could stay to aid continuity but was told no he had to pass her over to another officer, but as there were none free, i was asked to sit with her. As she was really upset we decided we would take her up to the TV room as it was a little more homely, so I went up with her whilst we waited for the call. However when SS rang back they said she had to go on her own somewhere else, and she became hysterical, and too be honest was not like a lot of the other 14 year olds we get in, she seemed very dependant on her little brother and sisters. She asked if she could call her sister who lived nearby and our inspector considered that a good idea as the sister had looked after Kacy before, so he called her and explained and asked her to come in so she could liasise with ss. Kacy who was still really upset and was shaking by now, well I couldnt just stand there and I kind of gave her a hug, and I am sure it helped as she calmed down a lot and then I sat and just talked to her for a while about her brother and sisters and her pets, and held her hand whilst we waited for SS and her sister to arrive. We both showed each other photos of our pets on our mobile phones and she seemed to cheer up a bit.

I spoke to her sister at the front counter and gave her the background and mentioned how upset Kacy had been and that i had done my best to comfort her, the sister couldnt believe Kacy had accepted a hug, but said she must have been totally distraught and asked to see Kacy her younger sister, the inspector was happy, but SS was not and would not even allow them to speak to each other through our glass counter until they arrived at the scene.

I was just stunned by this, the most they would allow was for her to speak with her sister over the phone, apparantly when Kacy was found by our officer she had been making her way to her sisters house, and only came with us as she thought she was going with her brother and sisters.

Anyway, in the end SS arrived and after lenghty consulation with the sister, let Kacy stay with her for the night till it could be sorted in the morning.

What is worse about it all, is the sister was a trusted and registered foster carer herself who had no other children with her at the time of the incident, so she was actually registered with ss when this happened but still they would not let her comfort her sister, even in the prescence of a police officer, not until the ss out of hours person arrived?????

The point of the story, what is even worse, is I got into trouble with my supervisor for giving the girl a hug and sitting with her because if anything had happened ie the girl had attacked me i would not have been insured

The fact I had stayed late after my time, with authorisation from the Inspector at his request, as I had developed a rapport with the girl, was not considered, I was told bluntly the police officer should have stayed

Hi
I'm a bit new to this so please forgive any mistakes. But I've just joined this wonderful site and after reading some of your posts on this subject I had to reply. I do worry where we're going. I have three wonderful grandchildren, just babies at the moment and both sets of parents are doing a brilliant job in the very hard task of parenting. We are a very close loving family with lots of hugs and kisses and I find it so sad when I hear stories such as I,ve been reading from some of your posts. I also worked for a few years in a school and when they brought in the rule of not comforting children when they were upset for whatever reason I found it very hard to continue,I just couldn't not give them a cuddle.
I find it all so worrying the way things are now,wondering what sort of life my grandchildren are going to have,but I guess as long as they are brought up in a loving environment then at least they have a good start.

Much Love and Many Hugs.
Onyx. xxx

Hi Onyx,

Sounds like you have done a wonderful job with your own children and likewise they with your grandchildren

At the end of the day, if we each as a unique being offer up the best we can to others whether they be family, friends or even strangers, then there is always hope for us as a race.

Unfortunately, in today's society, the increasing disrespect for others by some of today's youth and indeed some adults are always emphasised in the media, when what we need to do is emphasise the good that is done, sadly it is often the dramatic bad depressing type news that constantly hits the headlines, what we need is a new press attitude that focus's on the good that goes on, on happy news, rather than sad, disasters, since the more people focus on these the more of that kind of thing that will happen. Louise knows one of my mentors is Gregg Braden and there are various exact sciences out there that if we apply ourselves and the mathematics are right, we as individuals can join together to make a difference in our community and in the world.

In fact that could make a great topic, as everyone on SS forum could join together and start to spread the word and make a difference, would'nt that be a great way of replaying mother earth for her love over the years, and the benefits of this could be felt by us as well.

What does everyone think, is it worth a go????


Blessings of light to you all

Namaste

Elaine xx

Hi Onyx,
Ive got to agree with SoulShepherd well said......
First of all may i take the opportunity of welcoming you to our lovely community!!
Thankyou for taking the time to reply to this post Onyx.
(You may like to introduce yourself on the appropriate forum, the other members would love to hear from you)
Iam sorry to hear about the situation that you encountered with the school, that is just awful, i would feel exactly the same, not being able to comfort a child,
what is the world coming to??
I can understand why this policy is in place, but this is just ridiculous.
Lets all hope that eventually attitudes will change in society, but for now Onyx give yourself a big pat on the back as it seems you have done a wonderful job bringing your children up, Love is the most important emotion that we can display to our children, it helps them value themselves and shows them how to love one another.

Mother Teresa once said how disturbed she was when she used to visit the orphanages, she reported many deaths amongst the kiddies and this she put down to lack of love and hugs, they died she said because they felt soo unloved,how heartbreaking
Much love & blessings Onyx
Lightmessenger xxx